The phrase ‘midlife crisis’ has become part of everyday language, often reduced to clichés of men in their forties or fifties suddenly chasing youth, buying expensive cars, or making dramatic life changes. While these stereotypes may be exaggerated, they are rooted in something real. Midlife can be a period of significant psychological adjustment for men, one that deserves to be understood rather than dismissed. Let me talk about the psychology behind this phenomenon.
The concept of a midlife crisis was first described in the 1960s by psychologist Elliott Jaques, who observed that people in their middle years often experience a heightened awareness of mortality, ageing, and missed opportunities. For men, this stage of life typically comes with multiple pressures, career stability or stagnation, financial commitments, and family responsibilities. Children may be becoming more independent, while ageing parents require increasing care. These demands can leave men feeling stretched, uncertain, or dissatisfied.
At the same time, the physical signs of ageing begin to appear, changes in strength, fitness, or health that can challenge self-identity. For men who have tied their sense of worth to work performance, status, or physical capability, this shift can feel unsettling. Questions such as What have I achieved? What’s ahead of me? Am I where I thought I’d be? often surface during this period.
More of a transition than a crisis
Psychological research suggests that the idea of a universal ‘midlife crisis’ is misleading. Not all men experience it, and for many, it is better understood as a ‘midlife transition’ rather than an inevitable breakdown. It is often a time of reflection and reassessment. Some men may feel restless or low in mood, while others become more motivated to make constructive changes.It is important to note that for a minority, midlife difficulties can develop into more serious mental health concerns such as depression, anxiety, or substance misuse if left unaddressed. Recognising this period as a legitimate time of adjustment helps normalise the experience and opens the door for support and healthy coping strategies.
There are several ways men can approach this stage more positively:
Acknowledge the reality: Accepting that midlife brings change allows space to reflect rather than resist.
Communicate: Men often hesitate to share personal struggles. Speaking with a partner, trusted friend, or professional can reduce isolation. MensLine Australia (1300 78 99 78), and Beyond Blue (1300 22 4636) offer confidential counselling and resources. Many men also benefit from seeing a psychologist for structured support
Prioritise health: Attending to exercise, nutrition, sleep, and medical check-ups strengthens resilience and wellbeing.
Reconnect with meaning: Investing time in relationships, hobbies, or career shifts that align with values can bring renewed purpose.
Embrace growth: Rather than focusing on what is ending, midlife can be reframed as an opportunity for a new phase of life.
Midlife is undeniably a period of transition that can be difficult for men. With support and self-reflection, it can become more about growth, leading to greater fulfilment in the years ahead.
