The internet is saturated with ‘Dreams you shouldn’t ignore’, but what does psychology say about signs that dreams should be addressed in reality?

Dr Vivienne Lewis, practising Clinical Psychologist and academic at the University of Canberra, discusses how stress and anxiety can play out while we sleep.

The truth is, we all dream every night, whether the dreams are remembered or not. Oftentimes, we only remember our dreams if we are stirred while having them, or if we have a nightmare.

Dr Lewis says that if dreams are distressing and repetitive, it may be time to address them.

“For example, if we keep replaying and re-imaging something traumatic that has happened.

“Helping a person address and learn coping strategies for dealing with traumatic events can help them sleep better with less stress and anxiety, and therefore less nightmares.”

It’s not unusual for bad dreams to be a symptom of anxious periods in our lives. Dr Lewis says her clients frequently talk about having nightmares when under stress or when thinking about past negative events.

“I see it particularly in clients who have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) where a person has experienced something traumatic such as being in a car accident, experiencing a natural disaster, loss of a loved one, sexual assault, or military trauma.

“These dreams require addressing worries and concerns, and learning to relax and cope.”

Outside of PTSD, recurring dreams can still be distressing, such as dreaming of infidelity in your relationship.

According to Dr Lewis, recurring dreams about cheating don’t necessarily mean that you or your partner have cheated in reality.

“These dreams can occur due our past negative experiences with previous partners. They can also symbolise mistrust of our partner,” she says.

“We can have recurring dreams which might signal that something is unresolved for us.

“It’s not unusual and sometimes we don’t need to do anything to change this. But if the recurring dreams are distressing, a psychologist can help a person gain insight into why they are having such dreams and how they might change this.”

How do we address our dreams?

“For some people, it might be about learning to relax before bed, so your brain is less active and quieter,” says Dr Lewis.

“Good sleep hygiene helps with this, such as going to bed when tired, staying off devices before bed, using the bed only for sleeping, and not working before bed.

“Those who might have PTSD may need specialised treatment such as EMDR Eye Movement Desensitising and Reprocessing, which is a type of psychological therapy that helps a person deal with the traumatic memories they have, making them less intrusive, especially when sleeping.”

Good sleep hygiene means having both daily routines and a sleeping environment that promotes consistent, uninterrupted sleep.

Other than removing your electronics from the bedroom, this can include making your sleep space quiet, dark, and a comfortable temperature, avoiding big meals, coffee, and alcohol before bedtime, and being physically active during the day, so that sleep comes easier at night. 

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