When Amy Abrahams’ first child was three and a half, she was shocked to look around and realise that, in all that time, she only had half a dozen photos with him.

Despite growing up with the relentless beauty standards of the 1990s and early 2000s, Amy had never shied away from dressing up. After all, she had worked for seven years for a major plus-size fashion brand.

“This is wild, I thought. I have always had an interesting relationship with my body and with fashion growing up, finding where I fit in,” said Amy. “But I made the decision with my second child that I wasn’t going to do that.

“I wasn’t going to go through this series of stupid crash diets just to get myself back to that pre-baby place. I was going to try and work really hard just to be comfortable where I was.”

Her plan of attack was to start an Instagram account, where she would post a picture of herself every day, “wearing things that I didn’t think I could wear or should wear”.

“I was really sick of feeling really rubbish about myself, and not seeing myself in fashion.”

She wasn’t the only one. Just three years later, the 38-year-old has 16.6K followers on the platform, and has started Canberra-based styling service, Wear the Damn Dress.

She was tapped on the shoulder early on to be a founding contributor for Mys Tyler, an Australian fashion app that matches users with like-bodied women, allowing them to ‘follow’, find, and shop fashion that fits.

“I really connected with their idea to help women see other women who looked like them. You go online or into a store, all you’ve got is a 6’4” 21-year-old wearing a size four. And yeah, maybe it goes up to a size 16, but how do I know what that looks like?”

If you’ve ever looked at multiple online size charts and thought, ‘how is it possible that I can be five different sizes?’ then you’ve feasibly sworn off online shopping years ago.

However, Amy points out, in-store shopping is no walk in the park either for the average Aussie woman.

“The average size of an Australian woman is 14-16.

“Particularly in Canberra, where there’s less brands catering to the plus market, if the size 16 doesn’t fit, my options are instantly three-quarters out.

“There’s definitely a divide when it comes to fashion; The people who can walk into a shopping centre and know they will be able to find something that fits and not destroy their self-esteem in the process, and the people who can’t.”

Through Mys Tyler, Amy saw comments from other women experiencing the same problem.

‘I went into this store today and picked something up that I didn’t think I could wear … Then I thought about you, and you wore something like this, and I thought you looked great. I tried it on, and I bought it, because I thought I looked great too.’

“That’s the end game,” said Amy. “To help people go from ‘I grew up being told I couldn’t wear that’ to ‘I did it, and it was great’.”

Today, she describes her style as bold, colourful, and a bit extra.

“I’ve created a very careful office-appropriate wardrobe,” she laughs. “One that still caters to what I like to wear – pops of colour and pattern, elements of my style that I can incorporate wherever I am.

“A lot of the people who connect with me understand, like, ‘I’ve had kids, or my body has changed, and I feel a bit lost. I don’t know where to go anymore with my style’.”

Amy shares her five tips for re-starting your sartorial journey this summer:

1. Play with colour. “A lot of people believe that colour is not for them… but colour has a huge scale. You can try a little bit, or you can go really hard, depending on how comfortable you feel. Accessories are great if you’re not sure where to start. Throw on a little clutch, some bright earrings, or bright shoes, and you can really elevate a pair of black pants with a white blazer, or even jeans with a nice top.”
2. Play with pattern. “Some people look at prints and think, ‘I don’t know if I could pull that off’ or ‘I don’t know what to wear that with’. My best tip is to start with the dress. It may feel like a lot of pattern, but the good thing about a dress is you don’t have to worry about what to co-ordinate it with. Whereas with a top or a bottom, it can be hard to work out what doesn’t clash. A dress takes the guesswork out.”
3. Shape is in this summer. “One-shoulder tops, big sleeves, ruffle details. There’s a lot of structural elements that are coming in at the moment. I love a big statement sleeve. If structure on top isn’t what you’re looking for, asymmetrical dresses that drape from one side to the other are a great way to play with shape, and it means you can wear a classic colour and add a bit of interest to your look for summer.”
4. Texture is an easy way to elevate. “Just adding one or two textured details to your outfit can be a great way to play outside of your comfort zone without pushing too far. One we’re seeing everywhere this summer is plisse. The great thing about plisse is that it’s an no iron fabric that holds its crush for someone who loves an easy-wear garment.”
5. Matching sets limit the guesswork. “I love a co-ordinate set because you’re getting three outfits out of two pieces. Wear the top with white pants or a flowy skirt for summer. Wear the bottoms with a neutral bodysuit, or a white button up. If all else fails, you’ve got two pieces that definitely go together.”

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