What is it?
Feeling a sense of achievement is a very important part of feeling positive about ourselves. It’s when we feel proud of ourselves for having achieved something difficult or worthwhile to us. And it’s all relative, it doesn’t matter if others might have found the task easy, if we struggle with something and achieve it, then we deserve to feel good about it. Achievements come in many shapes and forms such as doing a task you really don’t want to do such as cleaning the house or completing a work or study task that is mentally challenging.
Validate yourself
Sometimes people look for external validation, like praise, for their accomplishments. We need to learn to praise ourselves as this is much better for our self-esteem. It doesn’t have to be visible to others and a lot of our achievements aren’t. At the same time, it’s important, especially for children, to be praised and validated for hard things they may do, such as coping with something stressful, finishing a chore, helping a friend or being kind when they could have easily not been.
Write down your achievements
Every day we achieve things and it’s important to acknowledge it. Sometimes writing down the challenging things you’ve done in a day or week helps us to see what we’ve done. It might be as simple as getting through a meeting at work you were worried about, speaking up in class when you usually don’t, or getting something in the house or car fixed.
Break tasks down
If you’re feeling a lack of achievement over something difficult, try to break the task down into smaller steps and celebrate completing these. For example, if a child is struggling to understand maths, break the learning up into achievable, manageable chunks for them, be encouraging and supportive, and celebrate their success. We know that all of us learn better when we feel we can achieve things that are meaningful to us, and it leads to better health and wellbeing. It gives us confidence in ourselves that if we make our goals realistic, we can do hard things.
Celebrate the steps
Celebrate all the steps. This is particularly important for students. Rather than waiting to celebrate at the end of the school year or graduation, celebrate completing each assignment or test and progressing with your learning daily. What reading did you get done today or what new information have you acquired?
Mental health achievements
Focus also on achievements that are social and part of our wellbeing such as relaxation goals and better sleep. Looking after our body by moving it every day and eating well are big achievements in our busy lives.
Feeling good about ourselves and our lives means we are doing things that propel us forward as well as coping with challenges and adversity. It’s not about doing it perfectly but doing what is in our mental health best interests.
